My mother, Barbara Hellam, was a intellegent, fun loving, happy go lucky type of gal. I don't know how you guys remember her, but I knew her as always making me laugh, with funny faces, or joking around. She was a great mother.

She married my father Dennis Garner, and had me in January of 1977. When I was 3 years old she and my father divorced.

She was a Christian and devoted her life to serving the church. She wrote poems and was in the process of writing a manuscript before she died.

Many of you know she was a beauty operator, she worked for years along side my grandmother Doris Hellam, and when she married my father they had a salon off of Brahnam way in San Jose.

She was a very creative person, whether it was doing hair, or writing, or drawing. But in all she put the Lord first. She taught me to do so also. She would pray with me at night, and I can remember going to church with her often.

When she passed, I was six years old, and she had remarried right before she had died. I am blessed to remember her so well, and to take after her beauty.

Most people know how she died, but I don't know if most understand why. Back then not too much was known about Bi-Polar disorder. They called it Manic Depression. My mother had been through some rough circumstances that I was too young to remember, but mainly with her new husband, and she tried to depend on her faith to cure her illness, but it was, in the end, her time to go. She had medicine, but if I am correct didn't have any at the time she died. When she tried to reach the doctor he was on vacation. So not being in her right mind she left a note saying she was going to be with the Lord, and she drove herself just past Carmel, to the Big Sur area and jumped off a cliff.

I don't have a grave site to visit her, nor do I need one, whenever I miss her I just gaze out onto the beautiful ocean, and say a prayer.

If you know somebody with a chemical embalance in their brain, urge them to not try to handle their emotions on their own and to seek the right professional help. If she had that help, and the right medicine I am sure she would be here today.

Her brother Bill is still working as a butcher for Safeway. I greatly miss my mother and I am old enough now and would love to hear from any of her old friends, or just to tell you guys that she is survived by myself.

21 years ago on the 12th of Febuary she passed, she is never forgotten, always a part of me, and always in my heart. I will love her forever and hope to see her in Heaven when my time arrives.

If any of you have any stories or comments about my mother please feel free to email me

Heather Garner
Heather-Chanel@attbi.com